Monday, October 01, 2012

Celebrating Love

Today commemorates the fifth anniversary of Michael's last day of life. I've been sort of silently weepy, since I'm thinking about him alone.

It is odd to me that more and more, and in increasing numbers every day, people whom I know now didn't know Michael. I've even been asked if I'm divorced. That always makes me bristle.

And, while Jack knew Michael, I know he doesn't like hearing about him all the time. So it's just you and me tonight, Michael. It's us! Oh, how I miss you! How I ache to feel your arm around me, to hear your laugh, and your gentle and reassuring counsel. How I miss your unquestioning, unwavering, and unconditional adoration. I wish I could kiss your cheek one more time. I wish I could feel your hand in my hair. I wish I could hear you telling me you're proud of me.

God, will this pain never end? I know that it has abated some. I go sometimes a month without crying now. I still long to find my creative spark again. I know Michael would want me to, and I want it for myself. Bbbbb... Enough blubbering. Tomorrow will be a new day.

Location : Mohave, Tucson, AZ 85710,