Celebrating Love

Today commemorates the fifth anniversary of Michael's last day of life. I've been sort of silently weepy, since I'm thinking about him alone.

It is odd to me that more and more, and in increasing numbers every day, people whom I know now didn't know Michael. I've even been asked if I'm divorced. That always makes me bristle.

And, while Jack knew Michael, I know he doesn't like hearing about him all the time. So it's just you and me tonight, Michael. It's us! Oh, how I miss you! How I ache to feel your arm around me, to hear your laugh, and your gentle and reassuring counsel. How I miss your unquestioning, unwavering, and unconditional adoration. I wish I could kiss your cheek one more time. I wish I could feel your hand in my hair. I wish I could hear you telling me you're proud of me.

God, will this pain never end? I know that it has abated some. I go sometimes a month without crying now. I still long to find my creative spark again. I know Michael would want me to, and I want it for myself. Bbbbb... Enough blubbering. Tomorrow will be a new day.

Location : Mohave, Tucson, AZ 85710,

What happens in Big Rapids

We spent the next two weeks in a single-minded pursuit: getting Jack's stuff sorted and ready for the auction. We sorted into essentially 6 categories: sell at auction, take to Tucson, take to Indian Dr, take to Michele's, donate, or recycle/garbage. The job was huge, but we took it one object at a time-- deciding, and then on to the next. The difficult thing was in coming up with places to put the various piles. With so many things, we were both in an extended state of stuff-overload much of the time.

For three weeks this continued, with just one or two days off. But the day came, and with some great help from a few of Jack's men's group friends, we got a large truck taken to the metal scrapper, a large truck taken to the dump, many boxes of stuff taken to recycling, a few boxes packed for Michele and Tom, a few things chosen for Indian Drive, a few boxes packed for Tucson, and a yard- and driveway- full of things to be sold.

Saturday, the day before the auction, was the real biggie. That is when the men were all there, tables were set up, and things were mostly hauled out. The weather reports were calling for strong storms with damaging winds and hail for that night, so we did our best to cover everything with tarps. I kept all of the items of fabric, paper, and wood inside for now. And we crossed our fingers that the tables would at least be standing on Sunday morning.

Sunday we awoke to the startling reality that it had rained only about 5 drops at the Valley Dr house! We missed church, instead opting to worship at the altar of commerce. LoL. We worked, pulling the rest of the things out of the house -- bedding, pillows, lamps, furniture, books, and most of the rest of the tools out of the garage. By noon, we were set to go, our auctioneers were there, and people were showing up.

The atmosphere was a festive one, as the proceedings got underway. We had rented a portalet, and there was a food cart, from which people could buy sandwiches and snacks. Many of our friends were there, along with 300 others we didn't know.

They ran two rings, with two auctioneers working steadily for four hours. And everything was gone at the end of the day. People were universally happy with their treasures, and we and the auctioneers were pleased with the money that changed hands. Of course, some things went very inexpensively, but other things made up the shortfall.

Location : 22, Tucson, AZ 85710,

High Time...

...for an update!

Jack and I left Tucson on Sunday, 7/8, and we made it quickly back to Paris. Tucson was hot when we left, with very intermittent monsoon rain. We had made some admirable progress on Jack's deck and skirting, but, with a combination of heat, humidity, things on order, and pressing business back here, we made the decision to head out.

Our trip back was mostly uneventful. There was a big rain and hailstorm as we went across the pass near Ruidoso, NM, but otherwise, the weather was fine.

We spent our first night out at Willcox, AZ, just 80 miles from Tucson. We like doing this. Sunday morning early, we did our laundry, including sheets, towels, and blankets. After church, we took care of our last-minute business, bought some groceries, packed our things into the RV, and prepared our cottages for our absence. Then, at 4pm, we put the RV into Drive and headed down the road. This keeps our day relaxed but gets us started down the road.

We drove through New Mexico, stopping for lunch at White Sands. We stopped north of Alamagordo at the Pistachio Tree Ranch, one of our favorite places, where we picked up some souvenirs. :)

Onward we drove, stopping at Clovis, NM for a short night. Tuesday was a day of pure driving, taking us to the KOA on the outskirts of Joplin, MO. This was another short night, and we were up and driving by 6:10 am on Wednesday.

Wednesday night, we made it to Avon, where we stayed with my sister and brother in-law. We went out to dinner and then talked till late. We slept in on Thursday, and, after our walk (we have been walking every day, without missing a day!), we had breakfast, and left.

A short and leisurely drive took us to Elkhart, Indiana. We did stop along the way at the Wakarusa Dime Store, where they sell fantastic huge jelly beans and other sorts of wonderful candies. Friday morning, we dumped and cleaned the tanks before getting back on the highway. We arrived in Paris at about 1 -- early in the day!

Arriving early carries with it a huge advantage -- a long day to get the house reopened, water heater turned up, things plugged back in, outdoor furniture put back and cleaned up, things taken in from the RV, and the RV cleaned up. We were able to do all of this well-rested and with no rush or tension.

We got the van's batteries reconnected, and it started right up. Into town we went, running errands, getting groceries and our mail. We visited Jack's house that he has sold. His things are still there, and he has plans to hold an auction. The new people are doing lots to make the house their own -- painting and installing new carpet, and replacing the garage door. And all of this while Jack's stuff is still there. We have some work ahead of us.

Calories and Combos

I guess this posting is a little bit about social responsibility. Now don't get me wrong. I believe that we're the captains of our own ships; but I also believe that we have a right to a clear view of the sea ahead.

I am more than a bit calorie-conscious. I think that one has to be, in order to be successful for very long in losing weight, after all. And one game that Jack and I have been playing of late is to guess how many calories in things. We frequently chuckle about serving sizes, too.

For example, a candy bar might say that it contains a mere 175 calories per serving. But, upon closer inspection, we see that this candy bar actually contains "2.5 servings." So this candy bar, which a person normally would just eat as a serving, actually contains 438 calories! It's a fun game, and we're always surprised at the results.

We were in Lowe's yesterday and were looking at the alluring display of snacks, placed cleverly by the cash register, easy for the working men and women to pick up on their way back out to their job site. We've done that, too.

One of their snacks was Nacho Cheese Combos. The calorie count was a modest 130 calories. The bag size looks like something that I could easily eat for a snack. But the bag contains *seven* servings! Seven! This comes to 910 calories -- 3/4 of my daily calorie allotment. And this is for a food that is otherwise a nutritional wasteland with no discernable vitamins, little protein, little fiber, and plenty of salt and fat. The per-bag sodium content comes to 2170mg, which is more than most of us should have in a day.

Ok so it's junk food. Where's the problem? Just don't eat it if you don't want it, right? Well, ok, but I maintain that the snack makers, package designers, and even Lowe's are not playing fair. The bag looks like a snack-size bag. Most people would assume that it's a snack-sized bag, since it's being displayed next to bags of chips and candy bars.

Even if someone were to take a glance at the nutrition label, they'd first see the 130 calories and think... "Not so bad -- let's go for it!" without continuing on to discover the seven-serving-secret.

I'm not intending to pick on Combos; all of the snack foods are doing this same thing -- packaging large quantities in one bag and then marketing these in the grab-and-go section right next to single-serving portions of other snacks.

I have a better idea for all of these marketers and for Lowe's, Home Depot, and Menards. Sell a "Job Site Package." This would consist of a larger box (or bag) of serving-sized portion bags. Of course, someone could still eat seven servings of the things, but they'd at least have a fighting chance of knowing what they were doing.

Choco-Date Oaties

Great recipe for delicious and actually not 100% nutritional garbage. Still a treat!

Choco-Date Oaties

6 T butter, melt

Add 3/4 C brown sugar & stir till smooth.

Combine

1/3 c all-purpose flour

1/3 c whole wheat flour

3/4 t baking soda

1.5 c reg oats

1/2 t salt

And combine all.

Add and mix well

1 egg

1 t vanilla

1c chopped pitted dates

5 oz bittersweet chocolate chips (I like Ghirardelli)

Drop by tablespoons-full

onto greased sheet.

Bake at 350 about 12 mins.

Leave on sheet for 10 mins.

I want to try these with coconut and pecans too.

Location : 46, Tucson, AZ 85710,

Dinner Tonight

This was delicious. Recipe was my own creation.

Penne with Salmon and Vegetables (4 servings)

Cut one med zucchini into thin medallions.

Mince 1/2 med onion.

Mince 4 cloves garlic.

Cut one small carrot into thin medallions.

Boil water for pasta in lg saucepan.

Heat 2T olive oil in a large skillet.

Add carrots and stir-fry a minute or two.

Add zucchini and stir fry another minute.

Add onion and stir-fry all till onions are translucent and the other vegs are starting to brown a bit.

Add garlic and stir-fry just one more minute.

Stir in 4 oz smoked salmon.

Stir in 1/2 small jar sundried tomato pesto. Let this wait while you boil 8 oz whole wheat penne. (I like Barilla just fine.)

Stir 1/4 C Parmesan into the sauce and reheat.

Drain pasta and dump it into the skillet, mixing in.

Serve with more parmesan and be prepared to serve seconds!

Location : 7727 E Broadway Blvd, Tucson, AZ 85710,

Good times

Things are going well in Tucson. While it is heating up, now it's time! Now would be a good time to tell you of one of my pet peeves. It is not fair for people to complain when it's too cold....and then, a few months later, to also complain that it's too hot. I think that everyone should choose one. I choose to complain about cold, and to enjoy the heat. :-)

Jack came through his carotid artery surgery, and he's now back to all his normal activity. His scar is hardly visible and he feels fine. The only lingering effect is that his voice is weaker now, particularly toward the end of the day. Vocal chord paralysis is a pretty common side effect and it usually is temporary.

Jack's been doing good work with remodeling his new cottage. Supplies are on order for his skirting and deck, and we're getting stoked to begin on these. He's been working on his kitchen. First, he made room for his range, which he loves for the big and very capable oven. This involved removing the existing stovetop and the drawers underneath. He had to redo the dominate top. The other big thing has been taking out a corner cabinet to make a panel which will accept a wall-mount tv.

I have helped just a bit. Mostly I've been taking it easy-- working on puzzles and reading. This is sort of a big deal. I've just started doing crossword puzzles and discovered that I rather like them! And cryptoquote...and jumbles...and ken-ken...and sudoku, of course.

I've been staying responsible with keeping track of what I'm spending. And I'm maintaining my weight (120) with my good healthful shopping and cooking, careful eating, and daily -or more frequently - exercise.

I am a little frustrated with my body image. I go to buy jeans, like today, and I pick up a pair that is size 6 and look like they should fit. I go try them on and they totally fall off me.

There are two things going on here. First is my messed up body image. I literally do not know how big or small I am. I look in the mirror and see a fat girl. I know that I'm not fat bc all the scales cannot be wrong.  But it is stupid to not be able to tell what I really look like. Frustrating.

The other thing that's going on -- and the dillards saleslady affirmed this -- is that the clothing companies are doing "vanity sizing." That is, they want us to feel good about ourselves, so they make it so that, if you were a size 10 (and you didn't actually change size), the clothes that will now fit are now labeled 8 or even 6. These women told me today that I'm now a size 2. LoL that's just silly. I have not even thought about the nightmare of bra-shopping! Eeek!

Location : 7727 E Broadway Blvd, Tucson, AZ 85710,

Lunch for two

This is a great little recipe for an easy, nutritious lunch or summer supper for two. This is my own creation and I will call it Smoked Salmon Salad.

Put into a small mixing bowl:

2 green onions - chopped

1/4 of a red bell pepper - chopped

2T Shredded or grated parmesan cheese

1/2 t mild curry powder

1/4 t garlic powder

1 T dried parsley

Stir these together and then stir in

1/2 C (about) Kraft mayo with olive oil (or your own fave mayo)

Now stir in 4 oz smoked salmon.

Serve with whole wheat bread rounds, pitas, crackers, or lettuce leaves, and carrot sticks and the rest of that red bell pepper, cut into strips. Yummy!

Location : 25, Tucson, AZ 85710,

Getting Warm

Yep, it's starting to feel like summer here in Tucson! Yesterday we had 101° for our first over-100 day for 2012. This is the second earliest that we've gotten this hot.

Jack finally got the word from his new vascular surgeon that his carotid artery was not 100% blocked, and so they were able to do surgery! I am glad that we found this particular doctor, because he was great. He was excited about operating on Jack, because son in-law Jack discovered that he has odd anatomy in his carotid artery. So Dr. Berens got in and did it just 2 days after Jack's initial appointment -- last Thursday. He ended up putting a teflon graft in there, because the artery was in such bad shape.

After a night in ICU, Jack went back home, and he's now slowly getting back to his old self. The only complication that he's had, it seems, is that his voice is now quite weak. I read that vocal chord paralysis happens in 10% of these patients and I'm suspecting that this is what's going on here. It usually resolves, and so we're hopeful that it's pretty soon. His voice actually seems better today.

Of course now that work on his new cottage is on hold. He won't be able to move heavy things or lift stuff for several weeks. If he could stand it, he could stand by and tell me what to do, but I somehow don't see that happening. ;)

Rainy again!

LoL one would think it rains here frequently, but such is not the case! Today's rain may be the first since I last posted.

I'm doing well and staying frantically busy accomplishing lots. I've finally decided upon,designed, and mostly installed (except for the part that is still on order from Lowe's) a track lighting system for my dining area and art wall. When said part arrives and the project is complete, I'll show you pix!

I've also been involved in the selection and procurement of a new cottage for Jack. The lot just south of me became available and I snapped it up. Jack's new digs will be moving in there after the old cottage is out. They were here taking down old awning and skirting a few days ago. Now we are just waiting for the hum of the wheels of progress.

This is going to be a fun development for both of us. I'm looking forward to not having to drive over to get him to go off and do stuff. And neither of us will have that chilly evening bike ride after supper.

I've managed, over a period of 5 months, to get my weight down to 122.5 -- a loss of 21 lbs of middle-age woman fat I did not want. I did this by religiously young what we all know we should. I've been exercising every day without missing a day since 10/25/11 -- mostly Wii Zumba and walking. I've been eating few snacks, and then it is just good stuff like 14 almonds, a box of raisins, or a carrot. No more random, chaotic eating. I'm counting my calories and keeping track of them, my exercise, and my weight on myfitnesspal.com -- a great free site and phone app which has been a godsend.

Still active in church, singing in the choir and enjoying that. Not sure if I'll be taking part in vbs but we may. I helped with music last year and it was fun.

We've been spending lots of time with Mary, running errands with and for her, taking her to church, and eating fabulous meals with her at Broadway Proper.

I'm spending a little time each day on Facebook. Friend me on there if you want. I'm on there with my first,maiden, and last names. I'll bet if you search for Janee, I'll be there. And I'm going to make an attempt to keep this up. I have loved this blog -- writing in it, reading your comments, and rereading my posts.

Location : 7723 E Broadway Blvd, Tucson, AZ 85710,